• SaituriHiiva@sopuli.xyz
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    1 year ago

    Could be either, could be a bit of both. Hard to say really. My guess is the last one.

    Now go do your chores, you lazy little hottie.

  • jocanib@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    It’s an actual thing. When it feels more like you have a teenage son than a partner it’s hard to get turned on by them, even if you weren’t already too exhausted from clearing up after them.

    • clockwork_octopus@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      So much this. Working all day is exhausting. So is keeping the house. Having to do both all of the time when you have an able-bodied partner? Gross. No one wants an adult child as a partner.

      Men have no idea just how exhausting it is to have to carry all of that weight. Well, some do, I’m sure. I haven’t met any, personally, but that doesn’t mean they’re not out there.

      Having a partner that is an actual partner gives you the room to breathe and relax. And honestly, that is the real turn on.

      • many_bees@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        I’m a man who had to do this. My partner was going through some pretty rough times in grad school, then left school, and had a lot of mental health work to go through. I was trying to be supportive, but we had to have a few conversations where I said that I didn’t find her exactly attractive in the moment because it felt like I was more of a guardian than a partner. It’s gotten a lot better since then, but it can be hard when your partner is going through hard times (or is just lazy, in some cases) and doesn’t see things as you do.

        Everyone needs to put in effort. It doesn’t need to be symmetrical (meaning you don’t have to do all the same things), but it should be approximately equal in terms of effort in both the relationship and your living situation

      • douglasg14b@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Men have no idea just how exhausting it is to have to carry all of that weight. Well, some do, I’m sure. I haven’t met any, personally

        When did this become about gender politics…?

        But yikes.

        Imagine the horror of I said the same statement but reversed the genders, and the stereotype.

  • s6original@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    This could be climate-related. She might mean you’re working too hard and need to cool off. Try to stay hydrated out there because you’re looking hot.

  • Beardwin@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    You should read The Five Love Languages. This is an actual thing. Different people express and receive love differently. “Acts of Kindness” is one of them. My partner loves when i do things, and i know this, so i do it because i know it makes her feel loved. And that’s hot.

  • Oldslewfoot@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    My wife calls it “chore-play” and it seems to really work for her. Even if its a trick, the house will be clean and everyone gets a little fun, what’s the harm?

  • marin@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    It could be because the people in her life (especially the masculine figures) aren’t the type to actually do chores without the initial request/push by another person. It’s some kind of shock and it could be seen as an attractive trait. Same feeling I got when I entered a healthy relationship with someone who’s not a slob. Doing chores is bare minimum though

  • Varlus@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Independence and self respect is sexy, and doing chores is a form of independence (you know how take of yourself) and is a form of self respect (you don’t let yourself live in filth). It also implies that you don’t view your gf as the designated house maid and not being humiliated/burdened like that is a big relief, especially for women who grew up around sexism. Who might have internalized the idea that men doing chores is on par with something like gift giving or going on dates, something special done out of love, and not just something that needs to be done. She could genuinely find you doing chores sexy, but also having to do less chores is a bonus no matter who you are, it can be both.

  • FartsWithAnAccent@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Could be real, either way I definitely get laid more when I do stuff around the house. I read a study that basically suggested doing chores helps because it relieves the stress of your partner, freeing them up to feel a little more amorous.

  • Abrslam @sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    Both is the answer. You do look hot doing chores. Also chores done is a turn on. It’s like oysters and chocolate, but your house is tidy and it’s not gross.

  • yumcake@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Some women’s libido goes down from the stress of seeing a lot of chores needing to be taken care of. Doing those chores reduced the stress. Going further and doing what is normally their share of housework can be an act of affection.

    It’s also noted in a study of women asked to rate a number of pictures of men on various factors including attractiveness and reliability. When they are also asked for dating preferences, as the age range went up, the prioritization on reliability ratings also went up. Doing chores is reliable AF.

    More to the point, she’s already told you she likes it. Just believe her.

    • Resistentialism@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Gonna go take any, if I even get them, future dates to a car wash and wash eh hell out of cars. Or bring them home and just clean.