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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: July 1st, 2023

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  • Like consciousness being greater than the sum of its parts and there being spiritual aspects to the universe. Like emotions existing as non localized complex energy frequencies, and karma existing.

    I used to be a hardcore scientific determinist athiest. The scientific method, mathematical logic, and unfalsifiablility were collectively my God. My version of the universe was a mechanical box our fates predetermined by an uncaring system. There was no room for magical thinking or maybe invisible unicorns. Thing either existed or they didn’t, yes or no, 1 or 0. Everything not absolute verifyable truth was worthless.

    Then I had a psychedelics phase, astral projected, experienced ego death, had telepathic communications with divine / cosmicbconsciousnesses using plants as mediums, looked at myself from third person with nonexistent eyeballs, ect, ect.

    I will never be able to prove to anyone my experiences are real, but what I experienced was real to me from my subjective reference frame in every way that matters.





  • Psudo random numbers come from a special set of mathematical equations which act as the basis for natural processes. These are known as nonlinear dynamic equations.

    Their outputs feed back into their inputs. They show areas of high initial sensitivity where any tiny change in input totally changes the output over time. Finally, they often show areas of different cycling behavior. The branch of math which studies them is holomorphic dynamics.

    The psudo-randomness of slightly different seed values generating wildly different outputs has to do sensitivity to initial conditions. This is a property of the paramater space structures in which those random number sequences cycles through. The ‘path’ of numbers that will be cycled through is determined by starting position and the geometric topology in the complex plane which the equation generates.

    By graphing and iterating psudo random equations in the conplex plane, it generates infinitely complex geometric structures called julia sets which govern how algebraic numbers cycle through pseudorandom walks depending on initial seed values and equation used. These julia sets often are fractals with infinite complexity at its borders at all scales of precision.

    Julia sets have a “stuff goes everywhere” property which is the the real magic of where sensitivity to initial conditions comes from. But now were getting deep into the weeds of math nerd territory.

    Simply put, you put a random number in and it spits a more-or-less random number out, thanks to wierd properties that the higher dimensional fractal hyper structures generated by the equation in the complex plane have. Those lower dimensional random number cycles are embedded into the julia set structurally.

    A big issue with psudo randoms is they will always give the same series numbers if you begin the equation with the same computationally finite seed values. You could the generated sequence of numbers to work back and find the seed values and equation used to generate them. This is a serious security concern when using them for cryptography. The amount of computational work it takes to work back is massive but its doable with modern quantum super computers.

    The mechanics of pseudo random numbers comes from statistical combinatorics, nonlinear algebra,fractals, chaos theory, and sensitivity to initial conditions.

    True random numbers come from directly measuring physical phenomenon with sufficient randomness in their mechanics.

    Things like the decay of a radioactive isotope or lava lamp turbulence have built in randomness. There is no seed or way to generate the same sequence of motions or predicting when isotopes decay.

    Turbulance for example has fractal properties in its energy distribution as well as random brownian motion adding up on the atomic scale. Radioactive half life has uncertainty principal built into it. These universal operations have true uncalculatable randomness thanks to entropy, the uncertainty principle, fractals, brownian motion, chaos theory, and sensitivitiy to initial conditions.

    The physical universe is the most powerful computer there will ever be. It calculates with infinite decimal precision in its mixed mathematical, statistical, and physical operations. It uses real trancendental like pi numbers with infinite non-repeating decimals, and does its calculations at the speed of causality/light.

    Our best super computers will never be infinitely powerful. Our numbers need to be finite and computable to work with them and understand them. The universe could not care less if its values are finitely computable or usable for human work.

    So theres fundamental limits to how random we can get through artificial computer algorithm generation using computable numbers. True randomness through physical processes leverages the universes in built infinite precision and mechanical algorithms as a black box and just measures the output result.





  • My niece and nephew ended up in the system and I felt morally obligated to put my life on pause and help my parents get them adopted and taking care of them. I couldn’t even move back into the house as each child required their own room so for the past year I’ve been living in a tent in their back yard. The whole ordeal has been emotionally taxing, but also kind of rewarding in weird ways I didn’t expect.

    In terms of the kids, its nice to be able to positively influence their lives and show them the kindness, love, and guidance I wish I had. When I make them laugh or they express gratitude It makes me feel like my existence wasn’t a complete waste.

    In terms of living in a tent? I came to love it. It taught me to overcome many issues and made me much more resiliant. To better understand the difference between convinence and necessity. Most of the things you think you need, you really don’t.

    From the basic survival stuff like adjusting to the climate, to building my own solar system, to learning how to clean myself and use the bathroom without running water. I minimized my entire lifestyle, let go of all the useless trinkets I thought I needed, and found the true basics of what a person really needs to be comfortable.

    I also learned how to confront my fears of what other people think of me for daring to live an alternative lifestyle in their view.

    I feel so mentally different from the person I was a year ago. More capable and confident. I feel like I can do anything, be anyone, go anywhere. I feel kind of great about myself and my situation in life. I feel like I’m an okay person living a genuine authentic life. Helping out my family while getting myself figured out.

    Also given the current housing and renting market, I can’t help but feel like I’ve figured out a cheat code. "Affordable housing? That converted out car looks good enough to me. "

    I dont think things would have gone this way had the kids not ended up in the system.





  • Me and my buddy were hiking up a trail one day kinda high and as we get up the mountain we hear multiple gunshots right near us enough to be legit scared that some crazy asshole is going ‘most dangerous game’ on our sorry stoner asses and FUCKING BOOK IT down the mountain. My fat ass learned how fast a body pumped full of adrenelane can really move that day.

    As it turns out there was a gun range nearby. So ultimately a nothingburger but a fun story to remember.





  • I know enough about smart technology to know the best lock is the old school analog ones. A hacker can break into many RF based locks with a toy turned garage door opener master key.

    The cloud based always connected to the internet ones are even spookier and I dont trust my network security enough for that shit and honestly neither should you

    Look I understand the temptation of smart technology connecting to your phone but were not talking about a fridge with a camera and mic that connects to the internet here. If there’s one thing I dont want hackers potentially getting into its the literal locks and bolts to my home and car. Get something analog.