Thanks for the summary. I signed up for it just in case, but don’t think I’ll end up using it. I have a similar experience with Mastodon, but then I was never really into Twitter, either.

I share your feelings on the importance of open platforms. While reddit may have been shitty for a while, the whole third-party apps thing was an eye-opener for me, and started me thinking about (and moving toward) open source.

My next big challenge will be to de-Google, but I’m increasingly up for it. Problem is I have a ton of site identities associated with my email address there, so we’ll see how that works out.

I agree that if you’re finding it hard to go in every day it may be time for a change. The main strategy I have used is to try to get clear on what you want, what you would consider to be need-to-have vs. nice-to-have. You can do this by making lists of things you like where you are now and things you don’t. The things you like are what you want to try to replicate somewhere else.

The main thing is to try to be more about moving toward something you want, and less about moving away from something you hate. Not always possible, but good to strive for. Otherwise you could end up repeatedly changing jobs to get away from bad people and drama, which, as many others have pointed out, will always be there to some degree.

I wish you well in your search. Stress is a real killer, and sometimes we don’t know how bad it is until we’re out of that environment. Trust your gut.

Agreed, great book. There is a second book in that series, The Boy On the Bridge, I believe. Also quite good.

I found the movie on Kanopy through my (Canadian) public library. I’m not sure how easy to find it is on other services, as it’s not exactly blockbuster stuff. I discovered it quite by accident.

The Girl With All the Gifts was pretty good, based on the book of the same name.

For comedy, one of my faves is Stranger Than Fiction.

I used to be responsible for the app portfolio in a 1000+ user company, and every 3 years or so I would go back out to the market and try hard to replace Adobe, just for PDF operations. Couldn’t do it because so many products were integrated with them, often in ways we could not reproduce with other products. The best we could do would be to pay for a different product for 1/3 of the cost for Adobe, and then still end up having to carry a significant number of Adobe licenses for cases when integration failed with the other product. No-win situation, and just easier to stay with the evil we knew.

I hate them.

Very much yes, on the “does it help” question, but you get results in direct proportion to what you are willing to put in. The great thing is that a therapist is someone you can be completely honest with, but it takes time and effort (and courage) to show up like that.

I wanted to point out that some health plans seem to be offering CBT (computer-based therapy) options since Covid, and these are often complementary to other psychology coverage. (I live in Canada, so ymmv.). They may be a good way to “try out” therapy to see if you can gain any insight, but remember they are not much like talking to a live therapist.

My experience is that you will know when you need to go. It may be a while after that when you actually do go, but it takes what it takes. Pain is a pretty persistent motivator.

Even if you are not in crisis, your awareness of your situation and your need for help in dealing with it are really positive and a great starting point. Follow your instinct and try to find someone you feel safe with. I would say that one or two sessions with someone are usually enough to tell if you can work effectively with that person, and it’s fine to decide they are not working and you need to keep looking. There are good and less good therapists, just like in every other career and walk of life.

Good luck to you! I hope you find what you are looking for.