I actually worked with someone named Richard Glick.

“Keto friendly”. There’s a guy on YouTube who shows the effects of different foods on his blood sugar, and one brand of supposedly “keto” tortillas had almost the same effect as white bread.

I would say you’re better off just because they can’t auto-brick your car remotely because your account isn’t up to date.

I assumed this person was being sarcastic, but I realize you can’t take anything for granted these days.

7x7= 49, not 47.

Dexter. I noped out after the Season 3 finale where they (John Lithgow’s psycho killer character) killed his wife. My gf kept watching, and was predictably pissed when they killed the sister in the series finale. I laughed like hell. I will not be watching the reboot.

I’m with you, prole. This is the kind of shit that starts cults. On a tangential note, I wonder how many people believe in the Great Jaguar Spirit because of Joe Rogan?

Steve Buscemi.

I was banned for expressing a political opinion. I was annoyed that someone else was trying to shoehorn politics into an art appreciation sub, to which I responded in a visceral way, typical of an alcoholic who had been dry for less than a week.

My younger brother, who taught himself how to play guitar, was amazed that I can whistle in tune.

Not being on my phone at work.

Have you ever seen the indy movie Citizen Ruth with Laura Dern? I actually knew the guy who played her meth-head boyfriend, and the fat-ass biker escort later on in the movie.

“And hear the lamentation of their women.”

One place I worked at was my 3rd or 4th print shop. Years ago, to save money on production costs, we would have to “gum the plates”. This involved cleaning and then “gumming” sets of used plates so they could be reused later. Once while at the plated gumming station I was gumming a set of six plates we had used to print a 6-color job. I was a helper on the six-color, but two color presses only had one man crews. One guy pipes up and tells me: “Hey, new guys have to gum all our plates.”

“Yeah? Bite me!”

“No, really!” this dickhead said.

“No, really!” I answered while grabbing my crotch in the universal gesture of disrespect.

I try like hell to avoid shopping at peak times. Before Covid, I could shop at 2am, but now I’m one of the oldsters waiting for the place to open at 7 or 8am.

I also like Antiques Roadshow, but only the American version. I don’t give two shits about your mums tea set that was signed by the Queen’s dog-wrangler that you paid 50 quid for that’s now worth 200 pounds.

Alcoholics, people who take Metformin (diabetes med), and people who eat at Bojangles. I’ve cut out two of these, see if you can guess which two.

Probably slightly less than they already do.

I’m old enough to have watched the show Davey and Goliath that Moral Orel was a parody of, which made it even funnier to me as an atheist who was forced to go to church as a kid. It wasn’t even that my mother believed the bullshit, she just wanted to be rid of me and my brothers for a couple of hours so she and my step-dad could play “slap and tickle”.

I wasn’t, fuck Jerry Seinfeld. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxyw38tODKg

Seinfeld isn’t that funny. This was a Carlin joke.